Fwd: Everyday

I never sent this one. He would just roll his eyes.

Everyday
I think of you.
In the shower. Lying in bed. Watching tv. When I get a text message-i hope it's from you.
You have control.
You've always had control over me.
I hope your happy. I hope your happy with your decision. I still don't understand what went wrong. What I did wrong to lose you.
I got sick today. My parents are in town & I took them to ellicott city. I remember the spot where you first grabbed my hand. . . & today I got so sick to my stomach thinking of that moment & how we'll never hold hands again. How we'll never do anything ever again with each other. . .
Sometimes I just want to say the meanest things to you so you'll feel just as bad as I do. Sometimes I just want to hurt you so you'll still feel the pain like I do.
I thought I would be over you by now. I hate myself because I'm not. I hate myself for not being good enough. I hate myself for ever thinking there stood a chance for us to last.
Sometimes I just want to pound my fists into your chest & cry until I pass out from exhaustion.